[C][M] The Pursuit Begins

There, he had said it. It was out in the open to talk about.

"I was leaving for a mere century." Hardly a few moments in their lifetime. It wasn't worth getting angry about.

"I've spent millennia away from you before while I've been working. What is so wrong about another century away?"

The woman's eyes narrowed. "Is it because now I am doing it for my own pleasure rather than a job for Father?"

The woman moved to sit in Jeg's lap, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders. "I wanted to see him, Jegudiel. Can you blame me? I loved him; love him." As terrible as that decision was, she loved him. "It's been millions of years since I last saw him."

The angel tenses in her embrace, his large hands gripping onto the sheets of the bed as his head and his heart conflict. Here she was, finally so close to him again, finally near him so intimately, but she was telling him of her love for another... For a vile fallen creature. Jegudiel would give anything to just shove her off of him, reject her so bitterly and leave, never to return again, harden himself against her rejections to his sensibility.

But he loves her and that keeps him from tearing her apart. Tearing her apart like she has already done to him.

"Stop it!" he yells, and for once there is pain in his voice, "Stop telling me you love him!" He pushes her to the side and stands, walking away from the bed with clenched fists.

"That monster is a fiend for taking you from me! For laying to you and putting these thoughts into your head that he loves you! He's a liar and a devil!" he shouts, wanting so badly to break something, to feel back in control of the situation.

The pain in his voice made her cringe.

She hated that. She had caused it. She was the reason for this pain.

Achinoam watched him storm away from the bed silently, her golden eyes flickering over him.

"You're right. He doesn't love me. Not the way I want. Not the way I love him." Yes, Belial loved her in some form. But not as much as she loved him. Not in the same way. That part of him was already taken by another. She had done that. She had bought Belial and Zakhar together.

"And yet I still love him. I'll never have what I want with him. I know that. I've known since he took someone as his mate. He has a soul mate, Jegudiel. He's not as heartless and evil as you think he is."

She gave a sad little half smile.

"...So what we had is dead. You gave it to some demon who rejected it instead of sharing it with me and it died," he says this bitterly through clenched teeth. He looks back at her, with anger in his eyes this time and hisses out,

"You never once thought of how I felt through all of this. I would have given you everything and you left to be with a creature who couldn't even love you back the way I could." He turns back around and slams his fist into the wall, leaving a hole through the sturdy material.

"You never once took into consideration that there was someone who would love you like that unconditionally!" he yells back at her, anger overcoming pain, "For some degenerate fallen! You left all I could have given you for that and never came back!"

The angel turns around and glares hard at her, heart pounding in his chest with a passionate anger.

"I hope you were happy down here while I was tormented over the thought of you, you selfish bitch."

"What we have never died." At least, it hadn't in her mind.

But, he'd always been the fallback. As cruel as it was, he'd never been the person that she had loved the most. She had known that. Jegudiel had known that. Even their child had known that.

There was love between Jegudiel and Achinoam. There still is love between them.

She let him yell. She listened to him rant and scream at her in anger.

"It's only been a few months, Jegudiel. Not even a moment of the time that I have down here. I couldn't leave and not come back. I couldn't leave you or our child or Gabriel or Uriel. I couldn't leave any of your for good."

She loved all of them.

"Yes, I took a moment for myself. I took a moment to be selfish. Is that so wrong? I have been working non-stop for millions of years. Not just a century shift like other Angel's get. I've worked non-stop for millions of years. Since the Fall, I've been stationed outside of that fucking garden with nothing but the Serpant and my imagination as company!"

She was getting angry now. It didn't happen often.

It had been a long, long time since she had last yelled as loudly as she was doing now.

"I was given a chance to breathe and think for myself for a measly hundred years and chose to live that down here. In the one safe zone I had. Father can't do anything to me down here. I can live in freedom. No garden to protect. No enemies to kill. I can be me here."

Hot angry tears filled her eyes.

"Yes, I am a selfish bitch but I see nothing wrong with that! I wanted a century to myself to do what I wanted for the first time since the Fall. I love you, Jegudiel. I always have. But I needed this. I needed to get away from home."

"You can't just take a break from life Achinoam! You can just take a break from your family and the people who love you! Do you think I knew you were coming back to us?! When I heard it was for that sick fallen I thought you had left for good!" He yells this all at her, spitting back her passionate statements with his own. He could feel the anger saturating his heart and spilling all throughout his body. Anger and love, hand in hand, rampaging through his body and mind.

"You can't be selfish if you have responsibility and a family! You left me back there with no warning and I had to pick up the pieces! That's what your selfishness does and that's why I'm acting so differently! Because I love you and there is nothing I can do about it, but hurt when you tell me you love someone else!"

Jegudiel bites his tongue and turns his back to her, fists clenched in anger, every muscle in his body flexing with tension and stress. He almost wants to go back and never see her again, but he knows he'll just end up back in this place yelling at her once again. Just like this.

"It was either this or do something stupid that would cost me my life."

Her firm, angry expression softened.

"I could never leave you for good, Jegudiel. I love you. I truly do." Golden eyes flickered up to meet his bright, angry eyes. "I'm too selfish to leave you for good."

She did love Jegudiel. Perhaps she didn't say it enough but her love for him was real. Very, very real.

She stepped forwards. One step. Two. Three. Slowly she approached the man. She pressed her forehead to his broad shoulder. Her lips touched his skin as her arms wrapped around his chest.

"I love you."

She didn't want him to be angry at her. She wanted her old Jeg back. She wanted to see the man she loved giving her a small smirk before punching her back away from himself.

His eyes in fact do soften against her words, his body relaxes against her touch, his disposition is melancholy, drain tired from worry over this one small woman. Jeg closes his eyes and leans his forehead against Achi's, his hands moving slowly to run over the curve of her hips.

"But you love the fallen more," he says, quietly for once, the pain in his voice overtaking the anger. If the heat of his anger could be felt, it would feel like steam sizzling off his flesh and into the air. His hands drop to his sides, away from her, but his head stays rested against Achi's.

He just wants things back to the way they were, when he was happy, when she was safe... But he doesn't know if it will ever go back again.

"Yes."

She loved Belial more.

It was something he had known since way before the Fall. He had her love but Belial had more of it.

The woman leaned up to press a soft, lingering kiss to his lips.

She'd been wanting to do that since he had appeared on the roof.

The angel lets her kiss him, but he doesn't kiss her back, his limp brown hair hands around their faces as lifelessly as his touch is against the woman's.

Jeg parts his lips from her's and turns his head to the side, not looking at her.

"I can't live with that," he replies, the anger starting to turn and boil in the pit of his stomach again. He ached to kiss her lips, but her lips longed for those of another, more impure being.

Her brows drew together in confusion.

"You've lived with that before."

Since before Belial had become 'impure' in Jegudiel's eyes, he had known that Achi loved the man more than she loved Jeg.

What had changed now?

The man sneers and turns from her in disgust,

"I never lived with it. I ignore it because you were so happy and that's what I wanted for you... But you're hurting yourself now and I can't stand to see that."

Once again the angel's fists clench again tightly at his sides and he grits his teeth.

"You've never considered how I've felt, but I've done nothing but care for you... You don't know what it's like to have so much love for someone and then get crushed by them," he snaps, wanting to break something out of his anger.

She couldn't think up a response to that. Yes, she guessed she was hurting herself, loving Belial so much in silence.

"I know exactly what that's like," she replied, shaking her head gently.

"Watching the person you love fall in love with someone else is all too familiar to me." She'd seen it. She'd spent weeks mourning the love that just wouldn't be and avoiding Belial.

The woman sighed softly. "I can't stop loving him, Jegudiel. I can't love him any less than I do."

"Then you know exactly what I am going through," he says, his voice almost defeated in it's tone, "But you can't even humor me by giving me that love you lost."

He feels like leftovers, used and left in the cold to be used again later.

"I would kill to not love you like I do," he says under his breath, his teeth grinding once more.

"I don't lie, Jeg."

Achinoam was truthful. Lies were very rare from her mouth and she made sure that that was the truth.

"You have love, Jegudiel. You have my love and never forget that."

Her gaze turned downwards at his confession. She felt sadness wash through her.

"I have the leftovers of your love," he hisses out, turning around to face her once more. The tall man strides up to her and grabs her arms in his large hands, staring down at her,

"Why can't you love me as much as you love him? Why does he deserve so much more? And what did I do to be left behind him in your heart? It has always been that way, even after I had your child and loved you endlessly! I've always had the leftovers of your love! Even now when he does the same to you, you love him more!" He shakes her a few times, his anger overpower his other emotions.

His eyes are stricken with sick jealousy, hurt and rage. He has never touched her like this before.

Achi didn't even utter a sound when his hands gripped her arms tightly.

He'd been rough with her before when they had been fighting, but not like this. This was more... dangerous.

Jeg was angry. He was venting anger that had been bottled up. It was good for him to do so. He needed it. But now he was getting physical.

How long until he got violent?

"I can't answer those question," she muttered softly. She couldn't answer them and he knew that.

How could one explain why they were in love?

The woman lunged forwards, wrapping her arms around the man, burying her face in his neck. Her fingers stroked through his hair gently.

Jegudiel's amethyst eyes widen when he feels her embrace him and he stands there, frozen. He walks forward with her still holding onto him and presses her back to the wall, his large arms pressed to the wall as well. The man looks down at her, his body encasing her's, trapping her close to his heart and he speaks with more passion in his voice than she has probably ever heard,

"You've hurt me so damn much Achinoam, and I will never forgive you for it." He leans down and kisses her lips deeply, wanting her to feel just how much he loves her, just how much his love for her has hurt him. He forces his tongue into her mouth and licks the roof of her mouth, pulling back to bite her lower lip roughly.

Jeg brings his face  down to start kissing her neck deeply, holding nothing back from her, licking and kissing her skin raw.

Her lips feathered against his skin as he backed her up against the wall.

She'd hurt him. A lot. She knew that. She'd done so much to hurt him. over and over. She hated herself for that.

Jegudiel was a good man. If she had met him first... Very cliché but also very true. If they had met first, he would be the one that had most of her affections. He'd be the lover she clung to desperately.

"I'm sorry."

I'm sorry I don't love you like you want me to.
I'm sorry you're so hurt by this.
I'm sorry.

She returned his passionate kisses in kind, hands fisting in his dark hair.

"Shut up," he grunts out as his mouth works against her flesh, kneading and biting, letting out both frustration and love.

But mostly frustration.

Jegudiel's hands grip under her thighs mercilessly as he lifts her off the ground, pressing her back to the wall. He sucks, licks and bites around her throat and neck, his hot breath pours out of his nose and between his lips.

His goal is to make her need him as much as he needed her, he wants her to need him, needs her to need him. Jeg's heart aches for it and longs for it in any way he can get it, even if it means being so rough with her like this.

She nipped his ear gently.

The woman could feel her skin being mauled at her neck. It would mark. She'd be wearing those dark marks for days.

Her legs wrapped around his hips when he pushed her up against the wall, her fingers curling in his hair, tugging harshly.

She wanted to feel his lips against her own.

With deep rocking motions he forces the woman against the wall over and over, leaning his head up to take her lips in his own again, being nothing but rough and commanding. He uses his teeth to sink into the flesh of her ripe lips between deep needy kisses.

Jegudiel's large hands press against Achi's rear with bruising force, anger and frustration fueling his touches. His long dark hair is soft under her fingertips, warm with the heat of his passion.

His muscles are tense all over his body, exposing every curve and feature they have to offer. His tongue strokes deeply along the inside of her mouth and around her lips when he's not biting them.

What Jeg feels is a swirling vortex of anger, passion, and longing. He forces nothing down and covers nothing up. He is exposing everything to her.

The passion that he was showing was breathtaking.

She'd never seen him so... raw.

Seeing him like this, feeling it through the rough touches of his hands and lips, was getting her hot and bothered. This was what she wanted. She wanted to see the man come completely unhinged.

His hips rocked against his own almost desperately. His passion was infection. She found herself getting lost in the feeling of his hot skin against her own.

She breathed his name softly in his ear.

With a fiery hunger the large angel uses his strength to force her against the wall and hold her with one hand, the other slipping under the waist of her jeans to grope needily between her thighs. The pressure of his hand against the material causes the fabric to tear and the button to pop off, but he could give less than a damn.

Jeg's rough fingers trace up and down the seam of her womanhood until he finds the small knob of nerves nestled between the womanly folds of her flesh. Achi could feel a small smirk form on his lips between their kiss as he locates her clit.

His finger kneads in deep circles around it, forceable almost from how aggressive he is being. He squeezes and pinches her, wanting to tease until she can't stand it and begs for his attentions.

With grunt he moves his mouth to her neck again to leave more marks, branding her with his passions for all to see. This is his introduction to this place. When people ask her what happened she'll have nothing to respond with but his name.

Especially to that filthy fallen creature.

The woman gave a soft hiss of annoyance.

"I liked those shorts," she muttered softly, biting his ear sharply in punishment. She really had liked those jeans. Now she'd have to go out and buy more.

Her anger soon dissipated when his fingers pushed between her thighs.

A soft purring moan rumbled in her chest as her hips rocked against his rough fingers. He had the hands of a warrior. His fingers were rough and calloused. The feeling of his rough skin rubbing against the sensitive skin of her womanhood was wonderful.

Her hips rocked harder against his fingers as he began squeezing and pinching her. Soft whines and moans filled the air.

Achi's head tilted back, offering her neck to his rough lips to mark.